What could you say to a dying person that would not enrage by its triviality?

Annie Dilliard asserts: “one should write as if posthumously…Write as if you were dying. At the same time, assume you write for an audience consisting solely of terminal patients. That is, after all, the case. What would you begin writing if you knew you would die soon? What could you say to a dying person that would not enrage by its triviality?”

In the last months and weeks of care-giving a dying loved one, nothing you do or say is trivial. It all has the most profound purpose and meaning. Will there ever be a more important time or place? The last breathe, the last heartbeat, the wrenching open of the veil that moves our loved one away from pain forever. Words do not matter. Being there matters. There is no right or wrong, so you don’t have to worry about getting it right. You just have to show up. There will never be another moment that compares to this in life…the last kiss, the last embrace, the last conscious moment that you’ll ever share. Don’t squander a word, a syllable, don’t squander a second.

Categories: Dying, Uncategorized

Tags: , ,

Leave a Reply

Fill in your details below or click an icon to log in:

WordPress.com Logo

You are commenting using your WordPress.com account. Log Out /  Change )

Google photo

You are commenting using your Google account. Log Out /  Change )

Twitter picture

You are commenting using your Twitter account. Log Out /  Change )

Facebook photo

You are commenting using your Facebook account. Log Out /  Change )

Connecting to %s


“Everyone who is seriously involved in the pursuit of science becomes convinced that some spirit is manifest in the laws of the universe, one that is vastly superior to that of man.” - Albert Einstein

Patrick W. Marsh

I always end up writing about monsters...

The Thesis Whisperer

Just like the horse whisperer - but with more pages

On The Heath

where would-be writer works with words

Girl for Animal Liberation

I am the voice of the voiceless

Sunset Boulevard

Writings of a Cinephile

Surviving Loss

“A single person is missing for you, and the whole world is empty.” ~Philippe Aries

Architecture NZ

a selection of fine contemporary architecture throughout New Zealand

%d bloggers like this: